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My Spouse Doesn't Owe Me Anything


Instead of "Why doesn't he/she help me more?" John Bytheway talks about how the ways we serve each other in a marriage are at first, appreciated, then become expectations, which can later turn into demands. This Saturday Kent had a shoot so I had to take care of the house and kids by myself all day. Then Sunday he was really tired so again I ended up doing a lot of the cleaning and kid-watching. I was tired too and noticed myself feeling angry that I had to do so much work by myself. My complaining about it probably didn't make him feel super motivated to help me more. I was expecting/demanding that he serve me the way he usually does. After thinking about it, I realize I would much rather take full responsibly for how much work it is to take care of a home and family and feel extra grateful for all the help he usually gives me. I'm so glad he gives so much to me and he really doesn't have to, it's his choice. Plenty of women have to do this all on their own for whatever reason. I'm so blessed to have him by my side. We can do so much more when we shoulder the work together than we could alone.